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My Down Time 2.0

Few weeks ago, I was being temporary transferred to other site located in KL. That particular site is one of the most challenging site because of the client is quite demanding. 

Most of my friends and colleague were really unsupported about it including my partner. They were really shocked and not happy for it. They started to give negative comments on the situation and it has worsened my mood which I was not in  a good state of mind. The instruction from the head is clear - I must go there next week (short notice).

Let me explain on my position in my company, I am not attached to any site with client at that time. Management has agreed to release me from my previous site that time and has appointed my other colleague to supervise my previous site. So I will be focusing on 'company' property rather than client property. 

My new manager that time informed me that they will release me once they get new staff. They have managed to hire a new staff which he is serving noticed at his company. Uncertainty which date that guy coming in and whether he will join the company for sure is really killing me from inside. Worried about I might be forever sitting in at site is really scared me and I was down for weeks. 

My closed colleague saying that they might put me forever there as what the company has done for one of the staff before. You can imagine that I was really demotivated and whenever I woke up in the morning I just do not want to go to work. I still remember one of the manager told me when she saw me before meeting 'you lost your smile Lisa, you always with a smile when you came her but today u seems not happy'.

Before I continued what happened after this story. I just want to add when my colleagues started to give all those sort of comments. I was really pissed which I said that 'what do you want me to do now? resign on the spot which you know I cant do that?' Tell me? - Actually, I did not share about my transfer to them. One of my colleague received the news and she decided to ask me in the what apps group to clarify. 

People might not noticed that I am a person who does not like sharing my own story. I will only open to share when I want it or I am comfortable with. For some reason, I know that nothing they can do beside giving comments. The only thing that make me feels good that time is 'let me talk'. 

I explained to them all those comments does not help me at all and I need magic from Allah swt. By getting the magic I need a positive comments, by listening to all negative comments only distance you from Allah swt. They respected me and let it go.

Once I started my duty at my new site, with all bad vibes and uncertainty feelings. My colleague got news that I will back on March. I was really shocked and not happy about it. But what else I can do? That is actually  the starting point I get my energy and positive vibes back. 
How?
I can not really explained why. Maybe on that point I was in 'Redha mood'. Accepting on the situation. Do things which has bothered me that time. Then, I am productive again. I started to see good things like I have amazing new colleague. I save money for lunch and so on.

My advise is accepting the fact and going with open heart is important to switch your energy. Supportive surrounding is also important to help you to strive. 
Actually, it is not an easy short journey for me. Even I keep on reciting Al Quran and reading quotes from Ulama, did not actually help me because I am not in a state of accepting the situation, worries about future and loss a bit of faith in Allah SWT. Astagfirullah. I have tried to reading between the line and I keep on persuading myself but it has failed. 
But one thing, I still praying and Dua follows with Sabar. Syukur in any condition. Increased trust and faith on Allah promised. Then you will get the magic from Our Creator.

If you read through again my write up, then you will know how all those negative comments will bring you down. You started to lose faith and you will go deeper into the ground rather than fly high up to the sky. When I am able to shut my friends and colleagues, my next battle is emotion and mind which may from Syaitan I guessed to be blame for? 

My other advise is keep on praying, dua, sabar, syukur and faith in Allah SWT. I know its hard, but u need to do it to survive and success in both world. This is my story for the time being. 

Thank you

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